The Parameters of Miracles

he hot morning sun blazed unmercifully down the main street of Newtown. The early morning smells of upscale coffee shops mingled with the leftover stench of garbage & half-empty beer bottles scattered in front of closed bars and dirty sidewalks. Newtown, New Jersey is a prosperous town. Its valued location, a short train ride from Manhattan has made it the new Mecca for upscale urbanites fed-up with Manhattan rents.

Its main street, once lined with small �mom and pop� stores, has given way to theme restaurants and a Barnes and Noble super store. The town is small in size , a mere one mile square. A vast tide of nationalities and financial levels live there side by side, packed into over-priced apartments, and rundown tenement slums. There is friction. The poorer tribes, the blacks, Spanish and the local white folks, find the new, young, hip crowd a bit too much at times, and fights have broken out on Foodtown lines over the strangest things.

On this fine August morning, Tommy Moran, age 35, part-time plasterer/ full time drunk, stood on a scaffold 25 feet above the main alter of the Church of the Divine Intervention located on Forth Street. And, even though it was only ten o�clock in the morning, he was sweating profusely. He had been out the night before drinking with friends. When he finally arrived home to his girlfriend Liz, she read him the riot act, and told him to find a new place to live�immediately!

His arms ached unmercifully as he placed the final touches of plaster onto the arms of the Blessed Virgin Mary. He knew he would need a drink soon, his hands were unsteady, and he was having dark thoughts. He bent over to fill his five inch knife with plaster. Suddenly, he felt dizzy. He stood up quickly trying to right himself. He felt himself loosing his footing. The last thing he saw before his descent downward was the face of the Blessed Virgin. He noticed he needed to touch-up her right eyebrow�then fell backward off of the scaffold. He extended his arms outward as if learning to fly. On his way downward, he broke off the arms of the statue of Christ. Before he hit the alter, he grabbed and snapped off arms and legs of well known saints, and lesser known holy people. Which, probably slowed down his fall, and most certainly saved his sorry life.

When he hit the alter, he landed on his right side momentary, bounced once, and then came to rest on his back, staring back up at the destruction he had just created.

He saw the face of Christ staring down at him with that all knowing look. Tommy�s first thought was that he was finally being punished for his evil ways with the drink and women - -but soon that thought passed and he felt a warm glow pass over his body, a feeling not unlike the first drink of the day. He tried moving his arms and legs and saw that he could. He realized that he was not paralyzed�things were looking up. He lay there feeling strangely serene as if the fall had rearranged something in his head. He sat up slowly and looked around. It was at that exact moment that the Monsignor entered the back of the church with the mayor of the city, Tony Rustic, and James Consworth, the city�s press officer. They had been discussing how their annual �Feast of The Daily Consumption,� was loosing its loyal followers now that the town was being invaded by newcomers. (Not that they were against the new people moving into the town, they just needed to find a way to make everyone happy in Newtown, while keeping the rents going upward.) Mr. Consworth was saying how they needed an angle, something new and exciting if they were going to keep the crowd�and the donations coming in to help the poor orphans in Guadalajara that they collected at the feast.

Then, like a Cecil B. Demille movie, sun flooded through the stained glass window over the alter. Tommy Moran stood up slowly and stared down at his body. He immediately noticed two things: his left foot hurt like hell, and his right hand was probably broken from trying to break his fall.

The Monsignor was the first to notice Tommy standing on the alter, hobbling around on one foot. It was only when the Monsignor looked up and witnessed the path of destruction, that he started to grasp what had happened.

�My God, son, what happened?� The Monsignor pointing up at the disfigured statues. Tommy hobbled some more, finally leaning up against the gold railing that circled the alter.

�I don�t know, Father. Either I fell, or one of your saints pushed me.�

The mayor, a brash, forty-something local boy made good, stared up at the alter and sank to his knees. His three hundred dollar gabardine suit shone in the sunlight like a fake religious artifact. He started to weep quietly. �Oh my God,� he said, between weeps� �Now what will we do? I�m ruined! How can I explain this to my voters?�

Tommy hobbled his 190 pound frame around the alter. He was feeling weak, and he really needed a drink. The thought struck him like a rotted two by four, that he was not going to get paid for this job.

James Consworth, the press officer, pulled out a cheap Kodak camera from his wrinkled suit pocket and started taking pictures. He photographed everything. When he was finished, he turned to the Monsignor, who was close to a full nervous breakdown. Mr. Consworth pointed towards Tommy and said, �There is your miracle,� like a circus carnie. �There is the man who will put the soul back into our little town. There is the man who will bring back the people to our beloved feast�and the donations for the orphans in Guadalajara.� The three of them stared at Tommy, the sun flowing around his head creating a halo.

�Please just get me to a hospital,� Tommy said. Then hobbled around the alter somemore.

The nurse at St. Mary�s Hospital knew Tommy well. He had been there before a few times for alcohol-related injuries. She was sure this was the same.

�So, Mr. Moran, what barstool did you fall off of this time?�

He didn�t even want to try to explain the circumstances to her.

Tommy stood up, with the help of a crutch. His foot was wrapped in an ace bandage, and his right hand was in a cast. He had broken his thumb and two fingers on the fall. The cast, was set in such a way, that it appeared that he was giving the whole world the finger. His foot was badly sprained, but would heal in time. He explained to the nurse why they would need to bill him later for his services. The nurse, a plump Italian girl from Bayonne, grabbed his cast hand and squeezed, lifting Tommy six inches off the ground.

�Mr. Moran, please try to keep yourself in one piece and out of my hospital.�

Tommy pulled his bandaged hand away. He limped out of the hospital with the help of a crutch. The August sun hit him like a left hook when he reached the street. He momentarily began to lose consciousness, but, the thought of going back into the healing hands of the nurse from Bayonne brought him back to his senses.

Directly across the street, was Louise and Jerry�s Bar. Many people believed this bar was situated across from the hospital because, for most of its clients�the hospital was their next stop. Tommy limped over to the bar and entered. Inside, a dark cavern awaited him. Most of the patrons had been there all night, and had probably taken a small nap on the floor or the bar. Tommy, limped his way to an open stool down near the pool table. A woman was sound asleep on the pool table, and had the pool table cover wrapped around her like a shawl.

He reached into his pocket and pulled out seventeen dollars. The money was crumpled and wet from the sweat of his body. He laid the bills on the bar and studied them. This was his entire fortune. He was now officially homeless thanks to his girlfriend, and, he was sure he was going to have to pay for the damage he caused at the church. Louise, an older woman in her seventies, moved towards him from behind the bar. She looked him over once, shook her head at the sight of him, and then asked what he wanted. What he wanted was to get blind. He wanted to get so drunk, that nothing in the world would matter. He believed that if he spent his seventeen dollars wisely, he could accomplish this feat.

�A beer, Louise. Let�s get our bearings.� Louise walked away to pour him a beer. When she was returning with his beer the door to the bar opened. The darkness in this place was one of its selling points. No one ever looked to see who might be entering due to the fact that one could go blind from the light. Besides, no one cared who was coming in. When Louise set down the beer, Tommy extended his one good hand towards the overflowing mug of ice cold beer. He was about to lift the beer to his lips and rid himself of this day, when hands touched his shoulders and began to squeeze. The pressure was immediate and intense. Tommy turned his head towards the thing that was squeezing the life force out of him. From the corner of his left eye he saw Officer Meek, a six-foot-six, two hundred and fifty pound black police officer smiling back at him. Standing next to Officer Meek, was James Consworth, the press officer. He stood behind Officer Meek like a proud parent who had just found his lost child. Officer Meek bent over and whispered into Tommy�s ear.

�I told you I would see you again soon.�

What Officer Meek was referring to was an incident that happened about three weeks back. Tommy had been drinking in a bar with a force that even surprised him one evening. He mistakenly confused the ass of Officer Meek�s girlfriend with someone Tommy thought he knew. He caressed the ass of this women, patting it a few times, as she made her way back to where Officer Meek was standing. The abrupt silence in the bar that followed this careless act was deafening. The fact that Tommy got out of the place with his life was a miracle that even an atheist like Tommy could appreciate.

Officer Meek released the grip he had on Tommy�s shoulder. Blood flowed freely again.

�Mr. Consworth would like to have a few words with you. I suggest you listen to him, and do what he says�don�t even give me a reason.�

Officer Meek left the bar. James Consworth sat down next to Tommy. He was smoking one of those thin cigars. He had the look of a sad man who thought he was happy.

�The Monsignor is very upset with what happened at the church today, Tommy. I can call you Tommy?�

Tommy nodded his head yes at the same time taken a massive drink of his beer. He felt the cool liquid move through his body. He was home.

�We have a problem, Tommy. The church members will want your head when they found out what you did with their church, why with the wanton destruction of religious symbols.�

�It was an accident, I�ll fix the statues.�

�No, we don�t have time for that. The Feast of The Daily Consumption starts tomorrow. What we need is an understanding by all people involved with what �really� happened in the church this morning.�

Tommy pointed to his empty glass. Louise filled it and took a dollar away. Consworth moved his face closer to Tommy.

�What we had this morning was a miracle. A true miracle that people will want to come to witness for themselves.�

�What are you talking about? I fell off the scaffold because I had been out drinking last night, and was still drunk.�

�Yes, but God, and his saints deemed it worth while to save your sorry ass. They extended their arms out to you, a sinner of the worst kind and saved you. You remember don�t you, how you felt the arms of Christ catch you and break your fall? You told me yourself.�

Tommy realized that this thing with the statues was not going to go away easily. He almost knew what the next words would be coming out of Conworth's mouth.

�We are having a press conference at five o�clock this evening. Not only are the local papers going to be there, but the church is also sending a delegate from Trenton to hear your miracle story.

�My story?�

Tommy reached for his beer. Consworth pushed it away towards Louise.

�Don�t serve this man anymore, he shouldn�t be drinking.�

�What the hell do you think you�re doing?�

�If you do not do exactly what I say, I will go outside and retrieve Officer Meek, who is resting in his police car. I will tell him that you destroyed the church this morning for no good reason except that you are mean and hate God. Then, he will take you to the county jail where you will sit for a few months until someone notices that you are missing. Do you think anyone will miss you?�

Tommy knew his choices were slim. He might be able to run away and get out of town, but where would be go with no money, and on crutches? He knew that this was one of those times when he had to go with the flow, and accept what was meant to be. He turned to Consworth who was staring at the woman now sitting up on the pool table. She was stretching as if she were on a beach on the Riviera.

�Okay, I�ll do whatever you want. But I have one request.�

Consworth could not take his eyes off of the woman who was now on her hands and knees on the pool table searching for something she had dropped in one of the holes.

�My God, what sad creatures we are,� Consworth said, turning back towards Tommy.

�I want one large beer, and one Jamisons Irish Whiskey�on the rocks�and then I will testify for you.�

Consworth pointed to Louise who had been listening intently to the whole conversation. She poured the two drinks and set them down in front of Tommy at the exact same time. She was about to take the money from the bar, when Tommy scooped it and shoved it in his pocket, then pointed towards Consworth. �He�s paying,� Tommy said, then sipped the Irish whiskey.

They were given a ride in Officer Meek�s patrol car to Conworth�s condo. A three bedroom deluxe model that was nestled on a quaint, tree- lined street overlooking the stinky Hudson River. Tommy was feeling better now that he had some drink in him. He certainly was not drunk�not even close. But, the few drinks he did manage to drink, stilled some of the pain he was experiencing from his fall. When they entered the peach-colored living room, they were met by Conworth�s present girlfriend, a Romanian rock & roll singer with maroon hair and a body to die for. She was curled up on a large couch reading the latest edition of Rocker Magazine.

�Hi, who is this poor soul you brought home?�

�This is Tommy Moran. He experienced a miracle this morning, and is going to tell everyone about it in a few hours�so we must get him ready.�

�How?�

�By making him presentable. Can you please put that magazine away, we have work to do?�

Atrenna stood up from the couch. She approached Tommy, and studied his visible wounds.

�Oh, you poor, poor thing. How can I help?�

Tommy quickly studied her, from her maroon hair to her green toenails, and decided Consworth had very eclectic taste. It was later that Tommy found out that Consworth promised to get Atrenna a green card, and make her a rock & roll star, if she stayed with him for a while.

�You need to help him wash up and get changed into a suit. He should fit into one of mine. Try the blue one with the stripes, that should give him a look of believability. I need to go back to the church and make sure everything is ready. Drive him to the church at five o�clock. And don�t you stay, Atrenna. Just drop him off and let him walk up the church steps with the crutch. We need a good entrance.�

For a second, Tommy thought he recognized sadness in the eyes of Atrenna. She realized that Consworth did not want her around at all for this charade. This was the kind of love he had for her.

�Okay,� she said, pulling Tommy towards the back of the house as Consworth scurried out to where Officer Meek was resting in his police car.

When they reached the back bedroom, Tommy sat down on the bed. His eyes immediately went to the wet-bar in the corner of the room.

�Lovely woman, would it be possible for me to have a drink? I normally don�t, but the pain is just too much at the moment.�

�God, yes. Will whiskey do?�

�You are the second miracle of this day for me. Truly I am a blessed man.�

She poured him a double of �Wild Turkey,� and watched Tommy as he emptied his glass and handed it back to her.

�One more I think will quell the noise in my head.�

She smiled at him. A genuine smile, and then refilled his glass.

�Okay, we don�t have a lot of time,� she said. She started to undress him, pulling his shoes and then his pants off. He was amazed how this day was progressing. Anything was possible he thought, as she stared at him standing there in his fruit-of- the-looms.

�Did you really experience a miracle today, or is this another of his money making scams?�

�Well, I�m standing here with a free drink in my hand, almost naked, with a beautiful woman. What are the parameters of a miracle?�

�Oh, please,� she said, �you can hardly walk.� Then suddenly, with the nonchalanceness of a used car dealer selling a lemon to a nun, she reached into his underwear, adjusted his cock to the other side of his pants, and said, �There you go, that�s better.�

Within the hour they were driving towards the church. Consworth had laid out the whole plan to him when they were back in the bar. He explained to Tommy what his responsibilities were to make the story stick. Tommy wasn�t sure how he felt about this whole new development in his life. In some strange way, things were looking up. He was going to be staying with the Consworths for the immediate future, (which took care of his homeless problem), he was wearing a very nice blue suit, had access to a free bar, and, he was going to be in charge of collecting money for the orphans at the upcoming feast. Maybe some good could come out of his adversities.

As they drove towards the church he stared over at Atrenna. She now had a silver ring running through her right nostril. To Tommy, accessories like this left him cold�except, on Atrenna, her eastern European charms seemed to blossom.

Tommy knew that what he was about to do was probably wrong. He knew lying about a miracle was right up there with car-jacking a pregnant lady on the way to the hospital. But, in this case, he had no choice. He did not ask for this assignment�it was forced on him, and, maybe, he could play the part to where no one gets hurt, and everyone gets what they came for.

When they pulled up in front of the church, Tommy immediately saw a crowd of about thirty people standing on the church steps. He was about to exit the car when Atrenna reached over and planted a kiss on his face. She smiled at him and said, �The parameters of a miracle are what the people need them to be. You�ll be fine.�

When he stood at the bottom of the church steps, he took a moment to study himself. It had been years since he had a suit on. He was still a good looking guy, even with the drink: black hair going gray in just the right places, dark thick eyebrows that had a life of their own, and a manner of speaking that had people listen to him even when he could no longer speak from the drink. He could do this he thought and started his ascent up the church steps. The main problem was his cast hand. As he moved up the steps, it appeared as if he were giving the finger to the whole congregation awaiting him. The more he tried to stop the movement of his right arm from swinging, (the left was holding the crutch), the more his injured middle finger spoke volumes! Finally he arrived at the top of the stairs where Consworth was standing with the Monsignor, and Officer Meek. He acknowledged the crowd by waving his middle finger, and then placed himself between Consworth and Officer Meek.

Tommy stared out at the crowd and recognized a few of the local reporters. Consworth walked to the microphone.

�Ladies and Gentleman, today in our little church a wonderful thing happened. A miracle, I believe. It happened to a man who is a sinner. A man whose life was dark and without purpose. But, rather than a lowly man like me try to tell you what happened, let the former sinner himself tell you of his wonderful experience.�

Tommy walked towards the microphone. He suddenly felt the guiding hand of Officer Meek touch a pressure point in his neck which caused temporary blindness. He stood at the microphone and stared out over the crowd staring back at him. They had a certain look in their eyes, a look as if they needed to hear something good. It was as if they needed to hear something wonderful and special from him�who was he to disappoint them?

�I am a plasterer. (The crowd shifted their collective feet as if preparing themselves for something important.) I was working here this morning touching up the statues of the saints, when I lost my footing and fell. As I was falling, I felt the touch of gentle but firm hands slow me down. It was as if I was being caught and gently escorted back to earth to be given another chance with my life.�

Tommy caught his breath and studied the crowd. A reporter from the Newtown Press snapped a picture of him. The crowd moved its collective feet again. Tommy was about to say more, when Consworth stepped in front of him like a convict in a food line, and, Tommy felt the gentle hands of Officer Meek pull him away from the microphone.

�Ladies and Gentleman, I�m sure you have many questions for our miracle man, but he has had a very long day. As you all know our �Feast of the Daily Consumption� will be starting tomorrow. We feel it only fitting that Mr. Moran man the booth where we collect the donations for the orphans of Guadalajara. We believe the money should pass from his blessed hands directly to God�s unfortunates. You can enter the church now and witness the place where the miracle happened.�

The crowd followed the Monsignor into the church where there was now new lighting flooding the alter, and a rope quartered off the area where Tommy took his spill.

Outside on the church steps, Consworth whispered into Tommy�s left ear, �You�re halfway home now my friend, don�t fuck it up.� Into his other ear Officer Meek whispered, �Don�t even give me a reason.�

But, Tommy was not concerned by the attention he was receiving from his new friends, he was feeling serenely calm from his experience of speaking to the crowd. It was as if he had really experienced a miracle. Had he? He felt that the public speaking had brought something out of him that he had long forgotten about. A certain organic feeling that maybe tomorrow could be better then today. He was savoring the moment when Consworth and Officer Meek escorted him to the police car. From there, they all went back to Consworth�s condo. They left Officer Meek resting in his police car when they entered the condo. They found Atrenna watching the soap operas on TV, crying her eyes out. When she saw them enter she said, �America is such a sad place, what is wrong with everyone?�

Consworth switched off the TV. �They all want to be rock & roll stars just like you.�

Consworth walked around the living-room a few times rubbing his hands in a maniacal fasten. �Okay, this is what we need to do to make everything run smoothly. You will stay here with us tonight Mr. Moran. Do not leave the house, or speak to anyone on the phone. Tomorrow we will go to the feast where there will be many people who will want to see you and speak with you, especially old ladies with check books. Many people will give you money for the orphans because, you are blessed now and they want some of that stuff.�

�The money is going to the orphans?� Tommy asked.

�Oh, of course it is,� Mr. Moran. �Then, we are all going to visit Disney World and rub Mickie�s ass for good luck.�

Tommy suddenly felt sober. It hit him like last call at his favorite bar. He realized standing there that he was more sober then had had been in weeks. Not that he hadn�t had a few drinks today, but by this time he normally was sleeping in someone�s backyard, being licked by a dog he didn�t know. He drew a deep breath and was amazed by the feeling.

�Then, after the feast tomorrow,� Consworth continued, �I�ll give you some drinking money so you can go on a long, leisurely drunk, and disappear for awhile. That way, it will look like you were either called to heaven for some consultant work, or that you ran away with the orphan�s money and lied about the miracle. Either way, it beats sitting in the county jail for the next six months for the destruction of church property.�

Consworth drew a long drag from his skinny cigar.

�I need to go out again. I need to make sure the papers are printing the story for the morning editions. Don�t leave the house, Mr. Moran. Many people are counting on you tomorrow to fulfill their spiritual needs.�

Consworth did not return to his house until very late that evening. He had been busy bending a few arms of local reporters, and filling in the Mayor and the Monsignor about the latest miracle developments. The strange thing was that both the mayor and the Monsignor accepted the fact that something good had happened at the church that morning. The mayor realized that the miracle got him off the hook with his constituents concerning the damaged statues, and, the Monsignor was beside himself with the attention he was receiving from the church authorities in Trenton. The talk of making him a Bishop had him praying even harder.

All of this free time without Consworth gave Tommy the opportunity to think about his predicament and to get to know more about the wants and needs of Atrenna. He was watching the evening news. He had helped himself to a drink, two to be exact. He was sitting in a large overstuffed chair with his cast hand pointing skyward, when Atrenna came into the room and sat next to him on the floor. It was a hot Summer evening and the weatherman predicted heavy thunderstorms, with the possibility of lightning tomorrow. Atrenna was dressed in a pair of white, tight shorts and wore a tee-shirt that read: �yes, they�re real,� printed across the front. Tommy looked at Atrenna and thought he could spoon eat her if he had the chance. But, of course he was in enough trouble already, and God knows what kind of relationship she had with Consworth.

�You know what I love to do on a hot Summer night like this?� Atrenna asked, reaching up and gently massaging the middle finger on Tommy�s injured hand. On the TV, Dan Rather was putting America to sleep.

�What?� Tommy asked, looking down at Atrenna�s perfect breasts.

�I love to get naked, and sing rock & roll songs in a cold shower. It really is refreshing on an evening like this, want to join me?�

She did say a few more things like not to worry about Consworth, he never had sex with her, she was there just for show. But all of this information was after the fact, and really not important in the immediate scheme of things.

Their repertoire that evening roamed from corny Broadway show tunes, to the aria of Aida. There was of course four renditions of the Beatles�s song, �Back in the USSR.� And, each time they sang the lines, �Ukrainian girls really knock me out�� Atrenna would grab his cock like a microphone, get down on one knee, and really get into the feeling of the song. All of this happening with his cast-hand hanging outside of the shower, wrapped in a plastic trash bag.

After their two hour shower, Tommy told Atrenna he thought she had a future as a Rock & Roll star, kissed her, then went to a small bedroom and tried to sleep. He lay there in the dark with a large smile, then realized he was sober for the second night in a row. He couldn�t remember the last time he experienced that feat. He thought about tomorrow and how he would either have to leave town or go to the county jail for an extended visit. Well, today wasn�t that bad he thought to himself, and then fell asleep to Atrenna singing in the other room.

Tommy was awakened early the next morning by Atrenna singing in a room down the hall. He lay there in bed for a few minutes listening to her. She actually had a good voice. A sweet, soft voice with a real innocence. He got dressed and headed downstairs. He knew he could probably slip out of town right now, if he really wanted. But, this whole experience with the saints and being the person the people looked up to for answers was something new for him. He had been the town's drunk for too long. He decided to stick around to see how the day progressed.

He found a nice pair of chino pants in Consworth�s closet, along with a tee-shirt that had a picture of Winchester Cathedral printed on it. Tommy took this as a sign that maybe the Gods would give him a running start today. He was having breakfast when Consworth came into the house.

�It�s time my little drunken heathen to earn your keep. Your public awaits you.�

Consworth said this while rubbing his hands together, as if looking into the future. Atrenna came down the steps. She smiled at Tommy, and then stared at Consworth. He really was too busy trying to figure out his next angle to notice Atrenna, or anything different about her.

�Please don�t come around the church booth today dressed like a tart. It�s important our loyal followers see us as God fearing Christians.�

Atrenna smiled at him and flipped on the TV. The weather man from �Good Morning America,� was warning of heavy rains and possible lightning by late afternoon.

�Damn!� Consworth said. �Hopefully we will have collected the money for the orphans by the time the sky opens.�

�I�m sure you�ll get what you deserve today,� Atrenna said to him, with as much sincerity as her Romanian heart could allow.

By twelve noon the feast was packed. From Jackson Street all the way to the river, people milled around eating food, drinking beer, and waiting for the statue of Saint Anthony to be carried down the street by the ten strongest men in town. The statue, a fifteen foot plaster monster, weighing in at somewhere around a thousand pounds, was the centerpiece of the feast. It was carried from the corner of First and Jackson, right to the steps of the Church of the Divine Intervention. People along the route touched the statue, or the men carrying it for good luck in the coming year. It was all very pagan in the best ways.

Tommy was ensconced in the church�s booth. Conswoth had the photographs of Tommy standing on the alter right after the accident, blown- up. They were there for all to see. By noon, Tommy had already collected four thousand dollars from delighted parishioners who touched Tommy as if he was giving out money instead of taking it. Consworth had dropped by a few times to count the money and congratulate Tommy on his ability to deceive. He told Tommy that he and Officer Meek would be by late that afternoon, right after the statue passed the booth, to collect the money and escort him out of town.

Tommy viewed the crowd with wonderment. He found it amazing how crowds of people could throw their beliefs, their faith to some unknown force. It was something he wished he could understand. He noticed as he hobbled around the booth collecting money, that his foot was feeling better, and his hand had stopped throbbing. He watched people walking by drinking beer and wine and was amazed that he didn�t want any. None! Had no desire to drink today. What was going on?

The Monsignor came by and blessed Tommy a few times. The best that Tommy could figure was that the Monsignor would get some of the orphan money for the church, while the rest went into the pockets of Consworth. Tommy was not a moral person per-se, but there was something about this Consworth character that made his blood boil.

Suddenly, a roar went up in the crowd. People parted on the street allowing Tommy to lean out of the booth, and witness the statue coming towards him from a block away. On the shoulders of ten, strong, religious men, the statue swayed in the air, an image of goodness and hope. Singing sprung up in the crowd, and from a third story window, a woman cried. As the men came closer, the sky darkened. It had been threatened rain all afternoon, and now seemed to be upon us. Tommy was mesmerized by the sight of these men carrying this statue. It was only when he saw Atrenna coming towards him crossing the street in front of the swaying statue, that he came out of his trance. She was carrying a basket of food. She was dressed in her normal outfit of very short pants, and even flimsier top. Then, behind her, he saw Consworth and Officer Meek trying to get across the street before the statue reached them. Tommy leaned out of the orphan�s box and watched while the drama unfolded. First, Atrenna turned and waved at the men carrying the statue. They stared back at her as if they were one large phallic symbol. And, then, they lost their concentration. The sky, at that exact moment opened up with a bolt of lightning that scared the shit out of everyone in a one mile radius. And then�the statue fell. It tilted over as if it were looking for someone in the crowd, and then crashed upon Consworth and Officer Meek. Pandemonium struck the crowd. People ran in all directions, away from the shattered statue. Atrenna stood alone in the middle of the street staring back at where Conworth and Officer Meek lay. She adjusted the halter top she was wearing, and then continued her journey to the orphan�s box where Tommy had a look on his face like God had come down himself and emptied off the street corner! The Feast of the Daily Consumption had come to a tragic, shattering end.

Many things changed for many people because of the lost concentration caused by Atrenna: Consworth was dead. His death was immediate, and satisfying to many people. Officer Meek survived, but due to his head injuries only answered to the name Rudolf Valentino for months. And what about our Tommy Moran? He gave all of the money he had collected for the orphans to the Monsignor. The Monsignor was eternally grateful and gave him back half the money for being such a good Christian.

With his new found fortune and freedom, Tommy and Atrenna traveled America. She, singing in small clubs, and Christian conventions, while Tommy worked as her agent. And Tommy's take on what he had just been through?

�The parameters of a miracle are as wide as they need to be.

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