The Big Float
s you drive along Route 700 from Virginia into North Carolina you will encounter the
quaint towns of Danville on the Virginia side and Eden which lies in North Carolina. The scenic
view of the land is breathtaking yet its beauty belies its dangers. The trees lush and green
sometimes are often so thick that even the daylight is held prisoner at the upper most layers of
a tree�s branches, never to penetrate the ground twenty feet below. These trees fight the Kudzu
vines which seem to choke the trees for every ray of light yet amazingly they live in harmony.
The Dan River flows through these two towns. The river is generally murky and cool during
the summer months. During the summer of my fifteenth year I was working part-time for the
town�s TV repair shop. This Saturday afternoon I was running late and rushing to get home to
take my shower and get ready for my date. My girlfriend only came into town one day a week
and Saturday was the highlight of our week. The ritual was to attend a movie followed by a
long stroll back to her sister�s house who did live in Eden. The walk afforded us the time to
talk about the week�s events and to share our dreams and aspirations of the lives we had yet to
forge. As I bolted through the front door and passed the living room door, my brother Richard
called out to me telling me to come here. As I stepped in the room I saw Richard was in the
company of his friends, Frank and Eddie. Richard and Eddie were squatting on the floor among
some papers which contained some elaborate drawings. Frank had his face buried in the
drawings. The poor boy was blind as a bat, and his glasses were as thick as the bottom of a
Coca-Cola bottle. I told Richard I was in a hurry but he said he only needed a minute of my
time because he needed a favor for something he was planning on Sunday afternoon. He
explained that they were going to float down the Dan River on car inner-tubes starting in Eden
and ending up at The Cavalier Boat Landing in Danville. The distance by car is about twenty
miles, but with all the twists and turns in the Dan River it could very well have been fifty miles.
No one really knew the correct distance and I suppose the drawings they were sketching was
an attempt to gauge the mileage.
Richard wanted me to drive Franks� car to a pre-determined location on the Dan River in Eden, drop them off and later in the afternoon drive into Danville and pick them up at the boat landing. I agreed for two reasons. I wanted to hurry out of there to get ready for my date and I really had no plans for Sunday. Actually the thought of driving Franks� car appealed to me and I had a fleeting picture of myself behind the wheel of the great looking Ford, a real cool car! I told Richard to give me the rest of the details Sunday morning because I needed to take a shower, press my clothes, and get the devil out of there because my girl hated to be kept waiting.
I picked up my girlfriend at her sister�s house and we headed off to the movies. On the way there I told her what my brother and his friends were up to and expressed my disappointment at not being asked to come along. I just wanted her to think that I was wanting to go but I had had too many ill fated adventures with Richard to mean what I had just confessed. His idea of adventure was to plan it, organize it, and recruit others into it. I had been his number one recruit to carry out these wild schemes and was really glad to simply be the chauffeur on this particular adventure.
On Sunday shortly before noon, Frank and Eddie drove up in front of the house. They brought the four inner-tubes with them but they were deflated. Richard threw the drawings they had been working with in the car and we all piled in and headed for the gas station to inflate the tubes. Once we inflated the tubes, the car was a sight, inner tubes sticking out the back windows and the trunk. We looked like a big black rubber ball barreling down the road. We were happy to be on our way. During the short trip to the river, Richard was telling us how he could calculate how long the trip would take by estimating the speed of the current and the direction of the wind. The other guys were hanging on his every word but I knew Richard�s adventures never came out like he so meticulously planned. He was good in mathematics and science, but he never entered the human element into his equations. Richard could make anything sound exciting yet when it came time to carry out his plans he took a few steps back away from the action. I was not surprised that this was Richard�s idea, I was however surprised that Richard was actually going.
As we zoomed past the grocery store Eddie suggested now was a good time to get some snacks. Frank stood on the brakes and two of the inner tubes were thrown from the car and were rolling down the street while at the same time his glasses slid off his face. We just knew this blind bat was going to kill us all before we even got to the river. We clamored to pick up the tubes. Not only were we embarrassed, but the tubes had been hard to come by and we could not afford to lose any. We stuffed the two tubes back into the car, made a U-turn in the middle of Main Street and proceeded to go get our goodies. Richard said they only needed a few things because in his rough estimate, the trip would only take four hours. He insisted they place their snacks in a plastic bag. As it turned out, this was the best idea he would have all day. With time slipping away, we drove out of the parking lot and headed for our appointment with the Dan River.
When we arrived it was just after noon and Richard went into to his act of figuring out the water�s speed, the wind direction, and heaven only knew what else to get an estimated time of arrival at the boat landing in Danville and ensure that I would not be late in retrieving them. While Richard was engrossed in his calculations, Frank walked over to me and proceeded to give me instructions on how he wanted me to drive his car and the entire time cautioning me to be extremely careful with his pride and joy. As an afterthought Frank asked me the mother of all questions...�Do you have a driver�s license?� when I answered I thought he�d come unglued. The thought of not having my license never entered my mind because I had been driving all over town delivering TV�s for my boss. My boss had said to me, �What�s in a piece of paper, you�re a better driver without a license than most people with one.� It was never my intention to deceive Frank. Now Frank was pretty upset and started getting onto Richard for suggesting that I drive his car. Richard�s contention was that I was a good driver and that I drove all over Eden and had never once gotten a traffic ticket. This however did not satisfy Frank and he kept saying no way, no how, no license, no driving his car. Now they had a problem! They had done a lot of planning and no one wanted to turn back at this point. What was the solution so the adventure could continue? Richard�s mind was racing and he quickly came up with his perfect solution. Why not let me take his place and therefore the trip would not have to be canceled. If this whole thing had not occurred at the spur of the moment I would have sworn that Richard had planned this all along and truth be known, I�m still not sure he didn�t. I wasn�t too hyped up about this trip because it seemed a little too dangerous, but Richard convinced me into it by asking me if I wanted to have Frank and Eddie think that Richard�s little brother was chicken. Oh no, I could and would not let that happen even if it killed me.
The moment of truth was at hand, it was time to shove off!! By Richard�s calculations we should arrive at The Cavalier Boat Landing between five and six that evening. He would be at the landing around four just in case we traveled faster than he had figured. We hurriedly pulled off our clothes and jumped into our swim trunks. Since Frank had forgotten his, he decided to go into the water in his Fruit of the Loom�s. He was not concerned about looks because we would be in the water the entire time until we got to the boat landing. We did not know how wrong this assumption would turn out to be. We all rushed down to the river bank and started to get in the water with our inner-tubes. Richard put the fourth inner-tube in the water and set off an argument. Which one of us was going to tow the stupid thing? What a hassle this was going to be but he convinced us to take turns towing it since there was a remote possibility that something could happen to one of the other inner-tubes and we should think of the spare like a life boat.
Off we went and as we pulled away from the edge of the river bank, Richard was shouting words of encouragement and that this was going to be the greatest thing we would ever do. For the first hour everything went well. The current was moving us along at a good steady pace and Frank commented to Eddie that we were making good time and we would be there way ahead of Richard�s schedule. As if jinxed by his optimism, the current slowed down. It slowed down so much we had to use our hands for paddles to move along in the water. Our food still in its plastic bag was dry but was becoming hard to hold onto while trying to paddle too. We decided to eat what we wanted and discard the rest, after all, this would solve the problem of having to carry the excess food. Huge mistake! We would later come to regret this hasty decision.
As we traveled on down the river small sand barges started to appear. We did not know how deep the water had been but this was a good indication that the water was becoming very shallow. I got out of my inner-tube to test the depth. I was surprised that I could actually stand up, in fact the water was only waist deep on me. I looked up ahead and saw that the sand barges were even larger. I suggested we get on the barges and walk a while to give our bodies a break from the water, but Eddie commented that if we did that we could not say in all honesty that we floated the entire distance. Frank was quick to chime in, so being out voted I stayed in the water, again this was another decision I would soon regret.
After a while the sand barges became less and less and the current picked up speed. This gave our arms a welcomed break and none too soon because we were tiring. This scene was repeated time after time. We would experience fast currents only to be slowed down to the point of stagnation. Occasionally we could hear sounds coming from the outer banks of the river and saw paths and even roads running down to the river. Soon that would all change. The vegetation along the river bank was becoming increasingly more dense and darker in color. It began to block out the sunlight and it gave us the sensation that we were the first humans to travel down this part of the river. It was exhilarating and at the same time it was foreboding. We had been in the water for five hours or so and we were all getting thirsty and hungry again. We longed for the food we had discarded earlier. We had thought of getting out of the water and try breaking through the dense vegetation, but we were afraid we would end up in a situation far worse than we already faced. Anyway we would soon be at the boat landing, how much further could it really be? Hadn�t we traveled so long that surely we were just shy of being there?
It started getting dark and now it really was too late to try anything else. Our only alternative was to stay in the water and hope that it would get us there soon. Suddenly it was pitch black! It was as if someone had turned out the lights! We could hardly see each other much less where we were going. We gathered close together into a tight circle to prevent from getting separated. Our conversation dwindled down to nothing and just listened for any sounds that might give us a clue to where we were. We heard a roar which seemed to come from up ahead but could not be certain because the darkness had disoriented us and any sense of direction we may have had. We knew that there was a huge dam on the river and that the dam was down river from the boat landing. Was it conceivable we had missed the boat landing in the dark and were we about to go over the dam!? The current increased dramatically and we had the sensation of going downhill. Then the realization came to us we had hit some rapids, thank God we weren�t going over the dam!! But we were too quick to be thankful because we started getting tossed around in all directions. Things happened fast! We lost our spare tube, Frank�s tube struck a rock and burst with an ear shattering explosion he called out to us that he had lost his glasses. Fortunately Frank was able to grab on to my tube and we all stayed together until we came out of the rapids. Everyone started talking at once. What were we going to do? Were there more rapids ahead? We knew we could not survive another trip through more rapids. We had been lucky so far but would our luck hold out? We had only two inner-tubes left. A tube carries only one person and that meant we would have to alternate one guy in the water for the remainder of our journey.
It was agreed that on the next roaring sounds we heard or at the sight of any lights we would get to a side bank and take our chances no matter what. We floated for what seemed to be several hours when we spotted lights off to our left. We knew the boat landing would be to our right but we decided that we would take our chances and get ourselves out of this harrowing situation. We headed for the side bank and came upon a large path, almost a road actually, that came down to the river bank. The path and the river met in such a gradual slope that it was just like walking ashore on a beach. When we left the water and were on solid ground we simple collapsed, exhausted but grateful. The sun, water, and lack of food had taken its toll on us. We remained on the ground until we could hopefully muster the strength our legs needed to carry us to the lights we had spotted earlier. Laying there spent on the wet ground, we all agreed we were just plain lost and did not know what dangers may lie ahead. After gathering our strength we slowly started moving up the dark path towards the lights keeping Frank between us to help guide him along. Within a few minutes we broke out of the wooded area to find that the lights we had seen were coming from the street lamps of a small housing community. What a sight! we were never so happy to see a street lamp. This confirmed in each of us that we were not going to parish on the river, there was hope for us, we only had to find a house with its lights on inside and hope they had a telephone we could use. Our thoughts were rushing by, we would call home, someone would pick us up and take us home. But wait!! We looked each other over and even under the light of the street lamp we could see that we were sunburned and coated with a light layer of mud from the river water. I asked Frank for the time and he stuck his arm out for me to see. The watch�s face was shattered, so much for knowing what time it was. We became concerned about knocking on anyone�s door, it must be late since it had been dark for hours. Would someone shoot us for knocking on their door looking like we did, we resembled little jungle people. We really had no choice, we took a chance and found a house with lights on. As luck would have it the car in the drive way had its motor running and the parking lights were on. We talked it over and I was elected to go knock on the door. Eddie was too shy and Frank was unable to see and was in his underwear. How could he even see who he was talking to, much less be taken serious if he was standing there squinting in his underpants. As I approached the house a woman came out the front door so that I would not to startle her I called out to her and asked immediately if I could use their telephone to make a collect call to Eden. She was somewhat taken aback and called for her husband who came out almost instantly. I ran through our escapades and current predicament with them and again asked if I might be allowed to use their telephone. The husband said he was sorry they did not have one but that he was on his way to work in Danville and offered to give us a ride as far as his place of work. During the ten minute or so ride into town we discovered it was now nearing eleven o�clock and that The Cavalier Boat Landing was approximately a mile away from the man�s work place. He let us out on Main Street and gave us instructions to the boat landing. Great, here we are, two guys in swim trunks one in his under pants in the middle of downtown Danville at almost midnight, we were prime candidates to be picked up by a policeman.
Everyone was busy looking for a phone booth, we needed to find a telephone before we left the city. We knew for certain there was not one at the boat landing. Eddie was ahead of Frank and I and shouted that he had found a telephone booth. Wait a second! We didn�t have any money. We should have thought to ask the man for a dime. We stood there deflated, so close yet so far. Frank blurted out, �Check the return slot�. What a break, one big fat shiny dime, the prettiest dime we had ever seen waiting just for us to use. I placed the collect call home and my Uncle Preston answered. He told me that Richard had been to the boat landing several times and had just left our house a few minutes ago and was on his way back to the landing. I told the others what was going on. Eddie and I grabbed Frank by his forearms and we all took off running to the boat landing.
When we finally arrived at the boat landing Richard was not in sight. He had not had enough time to get to the landing based on my conversation with my Uncle but our irritation made our patience short and we wanted him to be there. We were tired, hungry, and wanted him there to take us home now! I was going over in my mind the many things I was going to tell Richard. For one his calculations were all wrong and on top of being such a lengthy trip, he had nearly killed us all! I was not the only one dissatisfied, I heard Frank and Eddie talking between themselves about how unhappy they were with Richard and what they would say to him when he arrived. Fifteen minutes or so passed and there came a car sliding into the boat landing, it was Richard! He jumped out of the car and began telling us all the harrowing events he had suffered trying to find us. He was going on and on about how he had had to get our oldest brother, Jerry out of bed and drag him along with him to the Danville Police Station only to be told they had to enlist the aid of the Danville Fire Department. There they had spun his story and one of the firemen laughingly asked them, �What do you want us to do, roll our pant legs up and wade the whole Dan River in the dark looking for them?� Jerry did not see the humor in the fireman�s comments and the fireman was lucky that Jerry had not lost his temper and decked him. Both brothers were upset at the lack of help the Danville authorities had given them so they returned to Eden. Richard dropped Jerry off at his house went back home to see if by chance we had returned and when we had not, he decided to return to the boat landing once again. Jerry had decided he didn�t want to sit at home doing nothing so he sought help from the Eden authorities.
All the while Richard was talking, I noticed there were two people in the car. As I approached the car I noticed there was a girl in the front seat. Wait a minute, not just any girl that was MY girl! What on earth was she doing riding with Richard?! I gave her an icy stare and without speaking turned to face Richard. I demanded an explanation since I knew that Richard was sweet on her and would use any opportunity he had to be with her. He said he had stopped by her house to let her know that he feared we were lost and might be in trouble. She had volunteered to go with Richard to help him look for us. I was so tired, I told them both we would discuss it when we got home. I just wanted to get cleaned up and eat something.
We started to get in the car and stopped mid-stride. The second person I had spotted in the car was Richard�s fat butt friend, Bill. He was sitting in the back seat occupying the space of two people. We all complained to Richard about having to squeeze into such close quarters, that he never should have brought all these people to pick us up. Just touching each other was causing us pain and my being sandwiched between two people made my situation even worse. Bill started to laugh at us thinking all this was really funny. A few miles down the road he made a serious mistake. He let his huge arm fall across my shoulder. When he did this, I immediately barked at Richard to stop the car. Stop it at once, I had something I had to take care of! I think they all must have thought I needed to relieve myself. The car came to a halting jerk and I jumped out. I needed relief all right, but not that kind of relief. I stormed to the side of the car that Bill was sitting on, jerked open the door and pulled the laughing boy out. All the frustrations of the day were taken out on Bill, I started hitting him and would have continued hitting if the others had not pulled me off of him. Poor Bill�s actions got him the beating that Richard should have taken. After all, I really was angry at Richard not Bill, but Bill happened to be the idiot who touched me. We all stood there stunned. Eventually we all piled back into the car and the rest of the trip home was deathly quiet. The only noise came from the steady hum of the engine. No one dared to look at me and Bill shrank back into the seat. He seemed to get smaller and had volunteered to walk, but Richard insisted he stay in the car.
When we finally pulled into our driveway, half the neighborhood had come to the house to see if we were all right or were we missing any body parts. Richard started bragging about his plan and how there would not have been problems if we simply had followed his instructions. Richard had not given out any instructions other than how to keep our food dry. What the hell was he talking about? I had finally learned my lesson. This would be my last adventure with Richard no matter what, unless of course he taunted me and called me chicken.. We would have several more adventures before our childhood was over, but none would measure up to this one.
As the years have passed and this and other failed adventures are told and re-told at family gatherings, Richard has tried to convince our spouses and children that he orchestrated all these events so that his �little brother� would look good. What a brother, I�m glad I don�t have another one like him. I might not be alive to tell my tale.
